What’s good, wrestling fam? Fast Lane 2019 is officially in the rear view mirror. We’re officially on the home stretch to Wrestle Mania 35! We’ve talked a lot about how Fast Lane is one of the more unnecessary (for lack of a better word) events on the pay-per-view calendar and it seems like WWE picked up on those conversations as well. I thought I knew this card, but everything can change in an instant around here and so it did. I’d also like to apologize if I seem off my game here; I’m battling a bout of the flu on top of a sinus infection so I’ve been doped up on medicine lately.
Pre-Show: Xavier Woods and Big E vs Shinsuke Nakamura and Rusev
While definitely a filler match and somewhat of a head scratcher when first announced, it was nevertheless a fun way to kick off the show! This was possibly done to separate The New Day as Kofi Kingston had been called to see the McMahon family to talk about the WWE Championship match shortly before his team members went out for their match. Nakamura and Rusev are still working well together as a team that I didn’t know I would like. There were a lot of near falls in this one and twice I just knew that Rusev had won the match, but alas it was only a two-count. Highlights included a well-placed Matchka kick, Nakamura pulling the rope away from Woods’ grip while he was locked in the Accolade, and the Midnight Hour finish.
Winner: Xavier Woods and Big E
Grade: B+
Elias
Elias gets his own spot because I liked the way he was used throughout the event. He didn’t wrestle, but he did provide a type of narration while also consistently insulting the city of Cleveland. I thought this was an interesting from a creative standpoint. Bonus points for helping to further along the rivalry between Randy Orton and AJ Styles
Grade: B+
The Usos vs Shane McMahon and The Miz-Smackdown Tag Team Championship
Fast Lanae emanated from Miz’s hometown of Cleveland, Ohio so of course he rocked the Cleveland Brown colors and a snazzy shirt that said “Cleveland is Awesome”. Mr. Miz, Mike’s dad, was seated ringside for the match. The Usos showed why they’re one of the best tag teams of the last decade, making use of their quick tags and ability to move around the ring. Miz and McMahon had their moments too and added to their story as you could see some cracks in their teamwork. The Usos came away with their title run intact and McMahon officially turned heel on his partner, beating him up and choking him out in front of his dad. Other highlights include the Coast-to-Coast/Uso Splash collision and Miz’s attempted frog splash.
Winner: The Usos
Grade: B+
Asuka vs Mandy Rose-Smackdown Women’s Championship
This went about as well as I was expecting it to, by which I mean it was kind of sloppy. I must give fair credit to Asuka for working with what she was given. Sonya Deville got a kendo stick but we never really got an explanation as to why. Rose eventually slipped up on the ring apron and Asuka hit her with a spinning heel kick for the win. Afterwards, Deville tried apologizing to Rose but she wasn’t having it.
Winner: Asuka
Grade: C-
Kofi Kingston vs The Bar-Handicap Match
After meeting with Vince McMahon, Kofi Kingston was told that he had been added to the WWE Championship Match and that the match was starting soon. Kofi went out and it turns out, we had all been lied to and instead Kingston was competing in a handicap match against The Bar. This was basically a squash match that drew the ire of the crowd, even getting “This is boring” chants. It also went on way longer than it neeed to. The Bar won, obviously. I get that it was done to create more underdog sympathy for Kingston; it’s very similar to the Yes Movement.
Winner: The Bar
Grade: C
The Revival vs Chad Gable and Bobby Roode vs Aleister Black and Ricochet-Raw Tag Team Championship
I still don’t understand why three people can’t be in the ring at once for these types of matches, but other than that it was great. The match was definitely a sprint, but all six members of this match-up definitely excel in that type of environment. The Revival’s championship run hadn’t been all that memorable up to this, but the champs delivered here. We got to see more Black and Ricochet’s odd couple tag team, which has been on fire for the past couple of weeks. Even Gable and Roode, who’ve been kind of an afterthought, had a good showing here. The Revival hit the Shatter Machine on Gable to win the match and retain their Raw tag titles. Highlights included Richochet’s 630 and the double backflip taunt by Black and Ricochet. Post match, there was a brawl and Black they came out on top.
Winner: The Revival
Grade: A-
Samoa Joe vs R-Truth vs Andrade vs Rey Mysterio-United States Championship
This was another surprise. Originally Rey Mysterio vs Andrade had been advertised for the pre-show but about twenty minutes into the pre-show, this fatal four-way was introduced. That’s cool. This was another sprint as the action never really stopped. All four participants in this match have really good chemistry, no matter which combination of superstars get into it. It was on the same level with the Smackdown bout they had too; it’s not often that you can repeat a match and have the same amount of success. Samoa Joe locked the clutch onto Rey Mysterio and squeezed the life out of him to win the match. Highlights included Andrade’s hammerlock DDT, the 619 from Mysterio, and Truth’s axe kick.
Winner: Samoa Joe
Grade: A
The Boss n Hug Connection vs Nia Jax and Tamina-Women’s Tag Team Championship
Sasha Banks and Bayley looked really good here and retained their titles, which mean Banks retained a main roster title for the first time! Jax and Tamina had a few sloppy moments, including Jax almost dropping Banks as she went for the Samoan Drop. Bayley did a lot of the heavy lifting in this match, but ultimately won the bout with a cradle to Jax. It was okay; I’d like to see what Banks and Bayley can do with a more dynamic set of opponents.
Post match, Tamina postures up to Beth Phoenix. Tamina and Jax attack Phoenix. Nattie comes out to help her friend, but gets laid out as well.
Winner: The Boss n Hug Connection
Grade: B-
Daniel Bryan vs Kevin Owens vs Mustafa Ali-WWE Championship
Once again, we were swerved. Not only did the match suddenly change into a triple threat, we got a returning Mustafa Ali as the third participant. The crowd was absolutely heated about this as they were expecting to see Kingston in this bout despite his earlier loss to The Bar. To his credit, Ali was able to get this hostile crowd back on his side. Daniel Bryan played his heel persona up perfectly, thanks in part to being on the other side. He gets it so he’s able to really draw that heat and make Ali look like a total babyface. Kevin Owens did a great job of being a thorn in everyone’s side, effectively drawing some heat to himself as well. Highlights included a pop-up powerbomb to Bryan, Ali’s tornado DDT, and Bryan slapping Ali around and telling him that he didn’t deserve to be in this spot before ultimately ending the match with the busaiku knee.
Winner: Daniel Bryan
Grade: A+
Charlotte Flair vs Becky Lynch
Flair came out in her beautiful wine-colored gear from the Royal Rumble and taunted the hobbling Becky Lynch as she came down the ramp. Unsurprisingly, Flair controlled most of the match. Lynch did manage to lock on the armbar, but Flair escaped and transitioned into a Figure Four. Before she was able to bridge, Ronda Rousey sprinted out and struck Lynch, which ended the match in a disqualification. Lynch is now officially part of the triple threat for the Raw women’s title at WrestleMania. This has been a very overly-complicated storyline and the three women involved are troopers for dealing with it.
Winner: Becky Lynch via DQ
Grade: B-
The Shield vs Baron Corbin, Bobby Lashley, and Drew McIntyre
Not only was this Roman Reigns’ first official match since returning from battling Leukemia, this may have been the last time we see The Shield together. This match was chaotic all around. Seth Rollins got thrown around like a ragdoll a few times. Somehow Ambrose and Rollins ended up brawling in the crowd with Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley. We got some callbacks to the first Shield run as they performed their three-on-one beatdown and the infamous triple powerbomb. The match got a little slow towards the halfway point, but it was somewhat covered by the commentary team’s lamenting about this being the Shield’s last ride. Reigns looked great after not being in action for 18 weeks, though I think that he’s still not at 100%. There were a few times where it seemed he needed to recover. Highlights included the triple powerbomb through the announce table, Rollins flying out of the crowd to take out Lashley and McIntyre, and the superkick-Superman Punch-Dirty Deeds combination before another triple power bomb won the match for The Shield.
Winner: The Shield
Grade: A
Final Thoughts: It seems WWE learned from the past years’ events and their rather lackluster responses. We all went in with an idea of what was going to go down and while some things were predictable, there were enough little changes that kept you watching the event. Next stop: WrestleMania!
Final Grade: B+
-Wynter
