Little Rock, Arkansas hosts RAW this week and it begins with an image of Finn Balor, Ember Moon, Bobby Roode, Alexa Bliss, Natalya, Sasha Banks, Kevin Owens and Braun Strowman all in the ring, atop various sized ladders. Why? Well, they needed to have an argument of course! They all argued that they would win their briefcase and then Alexa said “well I think my Mixed Match Challenge partner, Braun Strowman is gonna win”, Sasha Banks responds with something along the lines of “Well I think my Mixed challenge partner, Finn Balor, is going to win”.. basically it was all very juvenile and awkward. It was then rescued by the RAW GM, Kurt Angle, who came out to a big pop from the crowd! He starts talking about this Sunday’s Money in the Bank PPV (Which I’m properly excited for!) then it was announced that there will be two Fatal 4 Way matches this evening featuring all 4 men from RAW’s MITB match facing each other and likewise for the ladies. Then out comes Constable Corbin, dressed to the nines with a waistcoat and sporting a new, cleanly SHAVED head! (I’ve been saying for over a year that he should shave his head. Turns out, I wasn’t wrong. He looks like a legit badass.) Anyway, he talked about how if the MITB contracts don’t come back to RAW then Steph McMahon won’t be happy, directing the comment at Kurt. The ladder club all start bickering in the ring. Everyone says something except Bobby Roode. Roode is just.. sort of.. there. Alexa screams and stops them all saying they sound like the “Real Housewives of WWE”. Segment ends with Braun saying he will win, cash in on Brock Lesnar and that someone on Sunday is gonna “GET THESE HANDS!”
FATAL 4 WAY – Alexa Bliss vs Natalya vs Sasha Banks vs Ember Moon
Steady back and forth. All looked strong in their own way. Alexa pretended to be hurt again at the start like last week, but the ladies were having none of it this week. Then they all pummelled her. It was definitely an entertaining match and there were some really cool spots throughout. Ember hit a crazy suicide dive cross body against the barricade on Banks and then Alexa just ran straight in with a HUGE forearm smash to Moon, almost turning her inside out! Natty is still selling her ‘injured’ knee from last week. Ember is the star of this match. She really got to show what she was about and those who aren’t aware of her NXT years, this was a decent showcase. The Eclipse that she hits on Natty in this Match is brutal! Kudos to Natty for the very hard sell on the impact. Everyone hit their finish in this Match, Alexa even attempted Twisted Bliss for the first time in forever! Natty got the knees up though.
After it was all said and done, Natty tapped out Bliss to win the match. – Winner is Natalya – This was a really steady match. Had lots of fun watching this one. Great open match, I am left feeling really excited for the Women’s MITB after this performance. I’m picking Ember Moon as the winner of the MITB. This opener really set the bar for the rest of the show. THAT is how you start off Monday Night Raw!
Backstage Segment
Kevin Owens tried to get Balor on his side for the Fatal 4 Way later, he brought Balor a bowl of olives as a metaphor for ‘extending an olive branch’. He said that they’re both former Universal Champs and that neither of them ever got the rematch they deserved for the title. He said if Braun wins MITB and cashes in and wins, he may hold the title, “Our title”, forever. He asks Balor to team with him and Bobby Roode tonight in their Fatal 4 Way and make it every man vs Monster. Balor looks set to ponder on that for a while.
Breezango vs Dolph Ziggler and Drew McIntyre
Quick match. Totally jobbing out Breezango, which got my goat a bit as I’m a huge fan of Fandango and Breeze. Drew and Ziggler won and explained that this was an example of their dominance and they will improve the Tag Team Division by taking all the other teams out of it. – Winners Drew McIntyre and Dolph Ziggler. After they cut a half decent, fairly samey promo about their win and what it means. Slowly building something here. I think they’re probably going to try to get them in the title picture very, very quickly.
Backstage Promo
Roman Reigns is being interviewed about Jinder Mahal and how their match will go this evening. He proceeds by calling Jinder an “idiot” for wanting this match and said “Jinder doesn’t get this for free, he’s earned this ass whoopin'”
Roman Reigns vs Jinder Mahal w/ Sunil Singh
So Jinder and Sunil make their way to the ring and Jinder grabs a microphone. He then begins to talk about Roman and how he will beat him this Sunday, Roman interrupts him as his music hits to his very familiar, almost synonymous, loud mixed fan reaction and get in the ring. Jinder then stops him and says that he will not be facing Jinder tonight, but instead he will be facing…. Sunil Singh. Sunil had no idea this was Jinder’s plan and looked terrified.
Roman Reigns vs Sunil Singh
Can you say “Squash”? Sunil was totally and utterly annihilated and ripped apart by a big spear. Jinder then got in the ring and attacked Roman from behind. – I liked this segment. It feels legitimate between these two. Loved the very typical slimy Heel move Jinder pulled off too. Their match at MITB could be a totally unexpected showstopper, who knows!
The B Team vs Beauty and The Manbeast
This match was over faster than a Politician’s promise on voting day. It’s almost 100% that Rhyno and Heath will split soon and when they do, personally I hope Heath gets a real decent push. – ANYWAY, B Team were victorious and one they’d won we saw Bray Wyatt’s vignette play and the Deleters of Worlds were on the tron. Matt said that this “jovial jamboree” that these two “mendacious monkeys” are partaking in was absolutely WONDERFUL! They gave them a standing “Woken O”. They smiled and then immediately changed to straight-faced and Bray says “we’re here”. The lights go out and turn back on quickly to display The Deleters of Worlds on the stage. They call the B Team “obsolete mules” and tell them they are all-knowing and omniscient, the Fireflies and Woken Warriors surround them and the B Team do not stand a chance. They will “eat you, then DELETE you!” – I loved this. I thought it was fresh and funny and had lots of decent potential. I hope this doesn’t lead to a heel turn for either pair. They are both over and it works. Looking forward to seeing B Team put their undefeated streak on the line for an opportunity at the RAW Tag Team Championships this weekend!
Promo
Next was one of my favourite promos in a while. Elias was announced and he sang a clever song about Rollins and slipped a line in on how much Arkansas sucks. He had a capo on the 2nd fret and he sounded awesome when singing. MUCH better and clearer than before. Hopefully that continues. Then he showed us all a new guitar. It was a Fender and the guitar paint job had Elias’ name on it and the IC title too. He said it was a gift from his close pal, John Mayer. Then out came Rollins who just drops the title and storms the ring, Elias stomps him down and goes for a Drift Away but Rollins sends Elias flying over the ropes where he seems to hurt his kidneys or his tailbone. But he walks it off and goes up the ramp. Rollins has his new guitar now and tries to Auction it off, Elias says he will bid for it and so Seth said he couldn’t do it. He put it down and raised his foot over it and Elias got really worried, then Seth says he can’t do it. The craftsmanship that went into it is too much, Elias looks relieved and goes toward the ring to collect his prized possession, but then Seth said that he doesn’t know how to play any instruments, but he does know one song, he says he hears it whenever he starts stomping his foot to the ground and then the fans roar and sing “BURN IT DOWN!”, he runs against the ropes and full on Curb Stomps the guitar, caving the body in and reducing it to nothing but firewood and cheesewire. Elias is devastated, but that fire is what is going to make their match a contender for match of the night this Sunday I think! The story is there, their characters mesh really well, even if they do look ridiculously alike. I like this and I hope Elias gets the title on Sunday. – but what I liked about this segment the most is that it was so very reminiscent of the “Rock Concert” that The Rock put on in 2003 where he had his guitar that was signed by Willie Nelson, and then Rock played songs that dissed the audience, the city and his rival at the time, Stone Cold Steve Austin. Who decided to make an appearance and Rock ran from the ring leaving his guitar. Austin then teases him and says he can have it back, but as Rock goes to get it, Austin stomps on it! It’s even so similar that both Austin and Rollins pretended to play the guitar once they’d destroyed it. Maybe it was a recycled bit with some tweaks or intentionally mirrored or even purely coincidental, either way I really enjoyed it.
Backstage Segment
Kevin Owens approaches Bobby Roode this time in an attempt to have him drink the Kool-Aid and join his attack on Strowman in the Main Event. Whilst Bobby looked disinterested, he did look to acknowledge that maybe, just maybe, KO kinda sorta has a point when he said “none of us can beat him on our own” . So KO then leaves the locker room and leaves Bobby re-jigging his game plan going into the Main Event.
Backstage Segment..ish
Next was an odd 30 second segment with the Riott Squad just.. walking down the corridor and throwing packets of crisps at people. They then through a few pieces of paper on the floor and finished if up with Ruby Riott cutting some poor blokes tie in half whilst he was wearing it. That was it. Maybe it’s their new thing? Like their new gimmick is essentially being Nelson, Jimbo and Kearney from The Simpsons or something. They’ll be giving Curt Hawkins a wedgie next week.
Bayley vs Ruby Riott w/ Riott Squad
This wasn’t the most thrilling match, but it was okay. Bayley got the upper hand and then Liv Morgan decided she’d had enough, so she jumped up on the apron and started taunting Bayley, Bayley went to get her and ended up taking a plunge under the second turnbuckle into the ringpost. Ruby picked Bayley up and hit the Riott Kick for the 3 count. Winner – Ruby Riott – after the match the Riott Squad attacked her again, got out a marker pen and drew a squiggly line on her.. then drew an “R” on her. Which I’m assuming stands for “recycled” as the NWO used to do this, only, it was much more sinister as they used to spray paint it on there. They even spray painted the WCW World Heavyweight Title with the NWO sign. So, if Ruby Riott wins the Women’s title at any point, I guess we should expect her to draw a big “R” on it in black Sharpie.
Promo
Ronda Rousey and Nia Jax are out to talk and hype their match for this Sunday. So, Nia basically says she’s been intentionally annoying Ronda just to “see what she would do”..? Now, my Step Son does this. He loves to push buttons just to see what people do. The difference is that he’s 6, Nia is not. I didn’t understand this segment at all. Ronda says “Nia, I never game plan. I improvise and this Sunday, I’m gonna improvise your arm off”. Which would be a cool line if this was the 70s and she was Al Pacino. I’m not saying it was all bad, there was a really decent moment where Ronda got knocked down by Nia, Nia picked her up by the ponytail and Ronda countered it into a Cross Armbar and Nia tapped out in about 4 seconds. It left me feeling fairly indifferent towards the match if I’m honest. Which really bums me out because I a fan of both of these women. I do think this is a work and Natty could end up betraying Rousey and costing her the match still. I also am worried that Rousey will win the title and then, just like the Universal Championship, we see it a few times every 6 months. I know Rousey signed a 3 year deal and said she wants no preferential treatment and said that this her life now, but she’s been signed since before Wrestlemania and she’s had how many matches? That’s not a full timer in my books. – however on a good note, it was announced this Saturday that Ronda Rousey is being inducted into the UFC Hall of Fame. Massive congratulations to her. I can think of no one who deserves that honour more than she does.
Curt Hawkins vs No Way José
I love both of these guys. But this was such a waste. These two could bring the house down given the opportunity! But instead, they sent José down to the ring with his Fiesta entourage, cha cha real smoothin’ it all the way to the centre of the ring, Hawkins is due out but he doesn’t enter to his music, José looks puzzled, his music plays again and still no sign of him, so the ref asks to ring the bell and begins a 10 count. One he reaches a count of 6, one of the Fiesta Friends jumps into the ring and rolls José up into a schoolboy for 2 count! It was then revealed that José’s Fiesta Foe was indeed…. GANGREL! No. It was Curt Hawkins. Hawkins ran at José, José hit a pop up punch to the face and that was all she wrote. – Winner No Way José. Nothing happened after. José waltzed on back to the locker room and left Hawkins dancing Billy Idol style. With himself.
Promo? Obstacle Course?.. Filler segment? Who knows at this point.
So.. for some unknown reason, Sami Zayn had set up an army style obstacle course around the ring.. He said that he did it in a minute and something seconds and that he bet Lashley couldn’t do it. Lashley came out and basically smiled and did it in 43 seconds, but firstly, Lashley said “I’m gonna beat your butt this Sunday” which was both hilarious and cringeworthy all at the same time, secondly apparently Sami Zayn has forgotten that he works for WWE and not The Jeremy Kyle Show or American Ninja Warrior and THIRDLY – Sami attacked Bobby after and ended up Helluva Kicking his head off, then swung on a rope like a pirate – which was the only good thing about this. This feud cannot end quick enough for me. I have about -3% interest in their match at MITB. I’m half expecting them to get Dr Phil in as special guest referee or something.
Braun Strowman vs Kevin Owens vs Bobby Roode vs Finn Balor
This match was absolutely great. The bell rang and with some hesitation, Finn and Bobby teamed with Owens to take out Strowman. Strowman threw them all around like rag dolls and they still came back, before too long it was all too much and the Monster Among Men succumbed to the combined power of the Glorious One, The Prize Fighter and The Demon. The fight was taken up the ramp to where Finn and Roode were hitting Strowman with a ladder, saving KO from a vicious Running Powerslam on the stage, Braun got hit in the face and laid on the announce table.. Kevin Owens then climbed a ladder.. stood on the very tippity tippy-top of the ladder and JUMPED into a Frog Splash! Which is inconsistent given his hesitation last week where he was too afraid to jump from half way up onto Balor in the ring BUT forget about that, because this was brilliant! This put Braun down for a while. So the 3 remaining all went at it in the ring and they ended up doing that spot that is done EVERY single time there is more than one person in the match, you know the one. The superplex gets reversed and then they throw a couple of punches and then the third guy will come and powerbomb the guy off the top rope and then the superplex occurs anyway. Yeah, that one. That happened. Then Strowman got up and went to the ring and actually ended up in a one on one battle with Balor, hit successfully pulled off a Sling Blade, into a Shotgun Dropkick and then landed a Coupe De Gras, at this point I was stood up and so excited that I shouted “cover him!!” So loud that I woke Elias, my 4 month old. As if Balor heard my yell from an opening in the space-time continuum, he covered him! 1… 2… broken up by Roode. Then Roode throws Balor into the ring post BACK first! It looked like it hurt like a female dog! Roode then set up and HIT the Glorious DDT on Strowman for the 1..2.. broken up by Owens who throws Roode out and climbs the ropes and HITS a Frog Splash! 1…2… KICK OUT! Braun looks like an absolute tank right now. The WWE’s resident Incredible Hulk! Owens’ face is a picture! Owens then rolls out and grabs a ladder. But Strowman stops his assault, picks up Owens and Running Powerslams him onto the ladder! 1, 2, 3. – Your winner, Braun Strowman. This match was insanely good. I cannot fault it. All guys involved laid it all out. I was thoroughly entertained so much that I physically jumped out of my seat and, I don’t know about you but, that doesn’t happen often.
Conclusion
As usual there were some good bits and bad bits, I feel like with the amount of pointless and embarrassing segments lately, like the whole Lashley/Zayn thing or the squash matches and the advertising DURING matches now! Like showing it like a replay, still watching the match but watching an advert for MITB too.. way to say “Hey! Looky here! This match you’re watching isn’t important… Buy this.” And I get that they need to advertise their products but… It was the GO HOME show to the PPV! Doesn’t the entire 3 hour show serve as advertisement enough? Literally every story going through the show culminates at Money In The Bank! So why advertise during a match? Use one the 7,368 advert slots for your shop or for the network you show every week instead. Don’t insult your roster by interrupting their matches. Not cool. All in all I really enjoyed a lot of this week, but I also didn’t enjoy stuff that, let’s face it, THIS close to MITB we really should be enjoying. Much better than last week.
7/10 for me.
Until next week, guys! Peace and love! I hope you enjoy Money In The Bank. I’ve got Balor and Ember Moon as my Mr and Miss Money In The Bank. Who’ve you got?
Please like and share away if you want to keep Pro Wrestling Journalism alive and superkicking. Follow @Kayfabetoday on Twitter and, if you fancy, follow my personal Twitter @90percentwater. Thanks so much for checking out my review!
– CB.
